Brothers to the End
by Bastable1993
Summary: Set in the Mass Effect series. It sets two inseperable brothers fighting along side by each other causing havoc and distress among the normandy crew and also value each others lives knowing as they stick and stand together they will survive.
1. Prologue

**(Authors Notes) Hello there everyone who reads this. I woould like to say this is my very first piece of writing and appreciate any review thats come from you lovely people. Be constructive and don't be way too hard on the criticism but give it if neccasary. I will continue more if this prolouge is more positive and successful. Enjoy. :)**

**Brothers to the End**

"I don't know how this had started; I don't know how this will end. Hell all I know I'm gonna take these bastards to hell with me." These were the last moments Shepard saw one of his best soldiers fought bravely against a horde of Husks with a banshee leading them.

"Cortez! Get us the hell out of here before they over run us!" Shepard ordered as more husks starts swarming around the shuttle, trying to claw their way through the door. "NOOOOOO! We can't leave him, we have to get him out of there!" screamed Michael who is wearing N7 armour with the additional Blue stripe which all N7 armour has.

"It's too late. The Husks and that damn Banshee has swarmed the place there's no chance of getting him back. If we go back now we all be dead. Do you want your brother sacrifice to be in vain?" Shepard have given a strict order which made Michael look out at the battle below seeing his brother single handily took out two Husks with his bare hands.

"Fine let's get out of here." Michael said reluctantly and Shepard banged the cockpit's door signalling Cortez to take them far away. As they flew away from the whelming numbers there was a sudden explosion where a couple of buildings collapsed on top of the remaining Husks.

The crew watch as in disbelief that Alan sacrificed his own life trying to protect the lives of crew blew up the reaper forces on his own. The people who was affected most was Michael who had lost his only living family to the reapers, Shepard took it hard because he was forced to leave another good friend behind, he sat there holding his head bearing the guilt that he left him to die and wishing that he took his place but he know that only he can stop the reapers and everyone knew what they have signed up for when they join his crew. But the person who took it hard was Mia vas Morya, sitting there not making a sound, knowing she would not see her lover again. The crew sat there quite on the way back to the Normandy.

Amongst the ruins of the collapsed buildings where many husks corpses lay motionless in heaps and body parts lay scattered. Among the corpses was N7 armour with a Red stripe underneath all the rubble and beneath a Banshee with a combat knife impaled between the eyes. There is shine of glittering silver which revealed to be dog tags lying on top of the armour and suddenly it draw breath.

As Alan rose from the rubble all scarred and wounded with burnt parts of his armour and also a few pieces missing and looked around to see if the others had made it out alive. He looked on to see if there's other means to contact the Normandy or hell any way off this burnt up planet.

"Right." He calmly said to himself. "How did I get myself into this mess?" As he looked on he started his journey to find some sort of communication by any means necessary. His thoughts dwell on returning back to Mia who he is determined to return to.

This is the story of two brothers. Their story entwines with Commander Shepard. But this story does not begin here. It all started shortly after Shepard has completed his suicide mission within the Omega 4 relay.

This is their story….


	2. Chapter 1 One year Earlier

**One year earlier**

On an uncharted planet a battle between Batarian pirates and a squad of elite N7 rages in an abandoned ancient ruin which the Batarians hold sacred, pushed forward onto the pinned down squadron. "Oh shit…. Oh shit" yelled one of the soldiers. "We're gonna die, I don't want to die in this shit hole knowing those guys will rape our asses when we are dead." One soldier wearing a blue stripe grabbed hold of the soldier and slapped him silly with a sign of amusement from the others who is watching and holding off the advancing pirates. "Get a hold of yourself Williams or I have to drag you ass back to you hot ass sister who I don't think she would like to know that her own little brother pissed his pants against a bunch of four eye's". "Can it you two and Michael grab hold of your Mantis and not your dick so we can get out of here". The squad leader yelled out irritated that all Michael did was sit back and watch the pirates move on without firing a shot.

"Yes sir, Mr President Sir, I shall hold my Betsy and show you why I'm the best at the N7 sniper school." With a grin Michael aimed down his sights and waited for a second and fired a shot taking down two Batarians right between the four eyes.

"See guys have little patience and faith and I can take these dead fuckers on my own" Yelled Michael with a sense of amusement and arrogance in his voice. As the soldiers was annoyed with Michael's accomplishment they did not notice one Batarian slipped pass them, ready to knife Michael from behind and before the pirate made the killing blow, a pair of hands grabbed the Batarian and slammed him into the floor with a knife in hand and stabbed the pirate right between the eye's. Michael spins around to see a N7 soldier impaling the pirate with multiple stabs to the head.

"Jesus Alan you just saved me from being another sex doll to them sicko's" Michael exclaimed in surprise and a bit embarrassed that he left his guard down for an inferior alien with no combat skills was about to kill the greatest sniper ever!

"If you paid any attention other than having your head up your arse you would have known that you was going to get killed but as always I have to save it so I can finish the job for them" there was hint of anger in his voice because his own brother let a Batarian nearly had the drop on him but also fear because he was close to death. 'Good job I was paying attention as I did'.

"Sir! Why are we here?" Shouted Alan towards their squad leader. "I tell you guys once we deal with these pirates". "Yes Sir" They all shouted and obeyed the order immediately.

The Squad hold back the pirates and with Michael's sniper skills wiped out half of the pirates out. The squad Leader ordered the squad to push the remaining forces back with Alan taking the lead charging with ferocity with his Avenger Rifle in hand and took out the remaining pirate out with Michael taking the glory sniped the last Batarian before Alan can finish it with his signature killing move which was with his bare hands. As the battle finishes the Squad regrouped in the ancient ruins and waited to find out what their mission was.

"Right men" the squad leader said but paused for a moment because Michael was comparing rifles with another N7 soldier and boasting how he killed a Krogan with one shot in the eye. After Michael caught his don't push me stare he stopped and stand at attention and waited for orders.

"As I was saying, our mission here is to find some Intel about Cerberus passing mission reports and funding's to one of their ships. It is not the SR2 Normandy who is captained by Commander Shepard, The Alliance reported this to us as we know but there is another who is researching and doing experiments on alien so we are here and have to find out why." "Wait sir? Why haven't we been told about this at our debriefing and why would it be here? It sounds fishy to me about Cerberus Intel being in this shit hole." replied an N7 soldier who was comparing with Michael. The Leader rolled his eyes and thought for a moment on how to answer the idiot's questions. "Well soldier I may have to put it simple to you. 1. Reason why you guys have no not been briefed about it is because Cerberus has spies within the Alliance and do not ask me why or how because I do not know. 2. Cerberus is too sloppy with the Intel and we had an anonymous tip off that the Intel would be here. So men move out and search for any documents data pads you name it."

"Sir, Yes Sir" obeyed the Soldiers and they moved out searching high and low until they come to a room which made Alan and Michael whistle by looking at all the loot and possibly the Intel they are looking for. "Now this is what you call a gold mine, look at all this it's it's..." Alan was speechless and looked at the data pad. 'This must be the Intel we were tipped off about.'

_Project Lazarus – Commander Shepard_

_Progress have been slow to rebuild and resurrect Commander Shepard but time will tell when the funding's and resources keeps coming in. ML_

_The project has come to a success and I have forward the results to the Illusive Man, I have recommended on planting a control chip in him but he says that he wants Shepard to be as he is before he died. ML_

_The Illusive Man wanted Shepard to investigate in the collectors and their involvement with the human abductions but the Illusive Man knows about this but he must have his suspicions correct before he can confirm it. He is also putting another ship together to preform experiments and research on Aliens that may help Humanity's cause against the inevitable Reaper invasion. ML_

Alan was reading the data and thinking they already knew of this. Why would they tip the Alliance something they already know then he notice another data pad and he picked it up and read it. 'By God this is the Intel we have been looking for' "Sir I have it" Alan shouted which draws the attention of the squad leader who grabs and reads the Intel that was handed by his fellow solder. He read carefully and his face turned to surprise and disgust at the same time.

"My God, This has everything we need, it has the name of the ship the routes it takes and the planets it has been. Not a surprise they abduct on colonies and not the main cities Like Ilium and them important planets. By god there's more in this chest data pads, star charts and also experiments data. Men we have hit the jackpot."

"Woooo we definitely getting shore leave for this hell I might meet you sister Williams" Said Michael. Williams punched Michael in the chest which winded him and shouted "Fuck You Michael, that's my sister you're talking about".

"Pack it in you two and leave it for the bar fight when we get back" Shouted the leader. "Call in the Evac and tell them we got the data and a little something for the Alliance." He said with a grin, as does his soldiers who was helping their selves to the spoils. As they waited for the shuttle to arrive Alan and Michael was talking about what they plan to do when they get back and what to do with the credits they found,

"I think we should throw a huge celebration party back at the citadel and have lots of booze and maybe hookers and booze and hookers again." exclaimed Michael. "Or we could put together that prank bomb we been eyeing at that citadel shop." Alan said. "Wait better Idea. We use both our hard earned cash which we have gained from the loot we found a little bit of credits from the dead pirates who accidently rolled over and died with bullets in tem and we can throw a party and plant the bomb in the middle with us on the edge sitting back and relaxing and enjoying the view." As they both look at each other thinking out if it would work or not, they smiled "Hell Yeah!" they high fived each other as they entered the transport and started to plan Operation Party Pooper.


	3. Chapter 2 Operation Fail

**Operation Fail**

The atmosphere on the journey back to the citadel was filled with excitement and relief knowing that they have survived and successfully completed a mission that may help the Alliance and also the Citadel council find out what's Cerberus is up to. The squad was discussing about past previous battles and talking about impossible feats they have done to gain invitation into the N7 elite squadrons. One claimed he tore a Batarian Pirates eye's out with only a knife. Williams claimed that he took out a squad of Vorcha with a single grenade, but Alan jokingly said "Nah he shit his pants really bad and the toxic fumes from his ass choked them to death." The whole squad burst out laughing out loud because it is a possibility that Williams is known to shit his pants when the odds was not in his favour, Even the squad Leader who rarely smiles and laugh gave out a small chuckle. They asked him what amazing feat he has done to take command of such an elite but sexy Michael may add in team. The squad leader pondered on his answer and he gave it out in a serious tone.

"Imagine this men. You are trapped behind enemy lines, with only a pistol with one thermal clip and knife at your disposal. DO NOT INTERUPT ME MICHAEL! As I was saying with only them as your weapons and I was on own on a secret mission which was to sabotage the enemy power generator which the 3rd division can press onto the enemy. I took out the guards that protects the generator, now listen when you kill them you have to do it stealthily or they will scream and it will reveal your position. So what I have done I grabbed onto one of them and slit his throat and before the other one can react I rammed my knife into his throat muzzling his screams and watch their blood drown them and made sure they are dead. I didn't have to time to move the bodies because I can hear the radio chatter that I knew the 3rd division is coming so I found some explosives that the idiots left lying around and planted the charges. Since the mission has to be done quickly I set it to ten seconds. I never ran so fast in my life but I got out in time. MICHAEL I SWEAR I PUT YOUR MANTIS SO FAR UP YOUR ARSE YOU BE SHOOTING BULLETS OUT YOUR MOUTH! The explosion drawn a lot of attention so I got my pistol out and started blasted my way out, picked up a rifle along the way from some poor bastard who brains been spilled out by my clips. Then I ran into this big ugly Krogan, not the prettiest guy going, he tried to charge me over but I had more speed so I slide under him and blasted into his was used to be quad which means bollocks in human and blasted his head open and to top it all off for you guys a little happy ending where I met up with the 3rd division commander and he asked me if I would like to command my own elite N7 squad."

The squad looked on in disbelief with a few holding onto their privates; Michael gave out a little tear and muttered. "That poor Krogan, I hope his balls have gone to bollock heaven."

The squad laughed out loud again from a sudden random comment form his truly. "What about you two? Alan, Michael what incredible feat did you do while you guys was in the N7?" asked one of the squad who had noticed that they didn't even tell them what they have done.

Alan just replied "We all heard that some guy called Kai Leng took out a Krogan with a knife right?" The whole squad nodded in agreement. "But has he taken out a Krogan with his bare hands?" Some of the squad mates looked on with even more disbelief with Williamson muttering that's impossible. The leader said it's true and he had seen it in person and he was the one who asked Alan to join his elite squadron which he accepted of course. Then Michael gave out a cough stating that he is ready to reveal his impossible feat.

"Ladies and Faggots I will tell you a tale that an elite sniper the best of the rest can say, my friends this was the mission that I took on personally with only a mantis and thermal clips. I was assigned to take out a Batarian general deep within enemy lines. I crawled and climbed to the highest advantage point where the air is hard to breath and I see the general in my sights I was about to take the shot and thought why not go awesome on this son of a bitch. I found a zip line nearby and zipped all the way done, no scoping the guards in the head with the general left and he had a sexy Asari hostage, I thought how dare he handle an Asari like that so I pulled out the knife and thrown it right into his eye, thus saving the woman and I rode a bike into the sunset and later the sexy Asari gave me her appreciation and that is why I am known as the awesome elite sniper ever."

Michael gave a superman pose trying to show how awesome he is but the reaction he was giving was the whole squad laughing their asses off and Alan just replied "Michael out of all the shit you came out with, that was pretty good but we can smell the shit coming from that a mile away. What really happened is that with only one thermal clip he took out the general and his nine guards. He only shot one thermal bullet which luckily hit the explosive tank on the vehicle which the general and his guards were in, Very impressive to shoot a moving vehicle." The whole squad was amazed that Michael hit an explosive tank with one bullet and very impressed but Michael wasn't too happy because his most awesome story was ruined by the real truth which he finds impressive but not so awesome in his opinion.

They finally reached the citadel and the squad leader said he has to report to the Alliance and told his men to go on shore leave for as long as possible because he is going to make sure that his men are going to have the longest R&R possible because through his eyes his men deserved it. This gave Alan and Michael enough time to plan their top secret mission Operation Party Pooper.

"Right Alan, here's the plan, me and you will split up knowing that your good at being secretive, you will get the bomb from Morbius pranks and me being awesome will set up the party so I have to find the best spot ever, so we are going to have it in the purgatory night club, so I be ordering food, booze, hookers….. Booze and more hookers." He caught Alan's glare.

"Oh Ok scratch out the food and have… Oh ok then we have no hookers but if they come to the party it is not my fault and if your turning gay don't bring me down with you." Suddenly Alan punched Michael winding him. As Michael clutched his chest he wheezed out in pain and replied back with a smile "Ok that proves you are not turning gay. But you got to make sure the stink bomb is in the middle and that the radius only covers the dance floor so it won't be too suspicious because the bomb would splatter affects. Here is the shit bomb I need you to get now let's start operation party pooper."

The two brothers separated knowing what their mission would be Alan knew he would have to get the bomb because Michael being clumsily as he is with stealth missions would end up in a c-sec cell with a lonely male Turian having his way with him. It was simple buying the bomb because all he has to do was wave a couple of credits and pass on Michael had sent him and the clerk's man just gave a mischievous smile and had the package from under the counter.

Alan had some suspicion that he was not the only one who was in the plan because clerk's man willingly gave it to him. Michael had everything set up with the music going and people was starting to arrive with Michael greeting everyone and to everyone's confusion asking if they have dry cleaning insurance. He was looking out for Alan seeing if he have arrived because he is designated to be here by 3:15 and it is coming up to 3:10. 'Alan where are you' he thought. Out from the corner he saw Alan walking with the package in hand stood next tom Michael.

"Your nearly late brother any minute wasted the mission would have been complicated" Michael hated when his improvised missions and operations does not come to plan because he always hated to improvise which would make look like a fool.

"Don't worry Michael" Alan said with a grin. "I get into the floor boards and set it up I need you to cause a big distraction for me to prime and rig it to the detonator."

'Yes' Michael thought with glee he handed Alan a private setting to his Omni tool so they can communicate with each so no other can gain access and also used to give warnings and the go ahead. They part ways again as Michael gathered the small crowd to round on the drinks, Alan stealthily removed parts of the dance and placed the shit bomb into open space. Michael was checking in if Alan is finished priming because he's moaning that his credit drinks are dwindling.

'That's the price you pay for this mission bitch' Alan smiled to himself thinking he doesn't have to splash a single shit for the customers Michael is occupying. "Michael charge is set and the detonator is prime meet me in Alpha relay".

"The what? Alan have you been drinking without me, we supposed to do this together" Michael replied on the Omni tool.

"No you Retard meet me at the edge of the club where the seats are" Alan replied palming his face in the process, 'he really need to know code words instead of the obvious'. They both meet up at 'Alpha Relay'. They discussed their next part of the mission.

"Right brother it is best that we have set up the detonation early because less people to distract and... Less money to dish out" Michael said the last bit like when he missed an easy target off the firing range and it has wounded his credits pretty badly from distracting all them people. "But now brother we wait because as I always say the more the merrier" More party goers started to come and the more and more fill the dance floor and the excitement and temptation itched Alan's detonation trigger but only waited for Michael to give the word and the bomb will explode covering everyone on the dance floor in Michaels specifically asked Krogan Diarrhoea. As Michael gave the word they froze in horror realising who was on the dance the floor dancing with a Quarian with curvy hips swaying around a human's groin the word Shit came to mind….. Commander Shepard and Tali'Zorah are on the dance floor.

The two brothers are starting to panic. "Oh shit… Oh shit Michael Shepard is on the dance floor I repeat, Shepard is on the dance floor. Advise to abort mission" Alan feeling the terror in his voice waited for his brother's voice to come on his Omni tool.

"Negative the mission goes as planned, press the trigger and we have ten seconds to get out of here. VICTORY at any COST!" Michael said with a serious and firm order, Alan knew that Michael would not want this only opportunity go to waste over Shepard who will surely kick their ass to dark space if he grabs hold of them. Shepard knows how much Alan and Michael pranks go to the extreme. Alan hesitated as his thumb itched forward to the button. He took a deep breath and screamed at the top of his voice "Fire in the Whole!" everyone looked at him not noticing Michael is sprinting to the exit because everyone did not realise that Michael has primed the bomb to its full capacity meaning he set it to cover the whole room. Alan pressed the button and sprinted to the exit, they both jumped for their life as the bomb exploded with pieces of Krogan diarrhoea covered the whole room. Michael satisfied that his plan had successfully completed his most dangerous mission celebrated by opening a can of Leo dextrin cider which he gone fond with, as the two bothers looked on in triumph they gave a big high five and danced to their victory.

Suddenly a small cough was heard behind them and they froze in place as they turn around they saw in pure amazement, Commander Shepard and Tali'Zorah was unaffected by their detonated shit bomb. "Hello boys, I'm Commander Shepard and that prank there was the best you pulled off to date."


	4. Chapter 3 Welcome to the Normandy

**Welcome to the Normandy**

Alan and Michael are in disbelief and double looked back at the shit covered night club and turned back to the clean couple who has not got a bit of Krogan diarrhoea on his uniform. "How, what, when." Michael stuttered being completely speechless that Shepard was once dancing on the dance floor when the shit bomb and went off.

"Well men since I have noticed that you two are in the vicinity and I have to convince Tali to leave before your prank set off." Shepard replied looking quite amused with the expressions on their faces.

"Ok ok. Shepard how the fuck, mind the language sir, how did you know that we had a bomb in the place by just looking at us?" Countered Alan who seemed not amused that Shepard who encountered them for the first time knew what's going to happen. Shepard stood staring at them, savouring the moment that he had actually was not fooled at all by the two's extreme pranks.

"Well since you asked politely, you guys have created a very big reputation within the Alliance to prank nearly soldier officer and high ranking official with no mercy and also very extreme but also I have to hand out very funny pranks. I have to give it to you; you guys are very good at organizing such very complicated pranks." replied Shepard who is still amused at the prank or the public disorder that the two have created.

"Thanks for the compliment your worship, but that does not answer our question how did you get away with my awesomeness". Michael looked very pissed off because none has ever escapes his most devious plans and top secret operations.

"Well for starters Michael, I have never seen so much dedication that you would willingly spend so many credits on a bunch of people. I have also noticed that the floor boards where me and Tali have been dancing on was loose and also seen your brother Alan holding a detonator, I might add that it was a good attempt to conceal it but even Garrus would have seen it from a mile". Shepard said.

Michael stood dumbstruck and started muttering to himself 'how did my awesomeness did not take out the great commander Shepard, all the plans want the operation was done according to plan, This is not Victory it is a kick in the balls'.

"Yo, Michael to planet earth, your awesomeness is dead" Alan said clicking his fingers trying to get his brother out of a trance. As they stood awkwardly Tali eyed upon an angry mob crawling out the club covered in shit with a few Krogan bouncers laughing claiming it was nothing.

"I think we should go somewhere safe because I hear that c-sec had arrested a couple of lonely Turians" Teased Tali noticing that the two brothers clenched their arses, not wanting to lose the anal virginity to a bunch of sicko's on my Michael's opinion.

The group moved quickly before the mob finds them and knock the duo out with either their fists and biotic powers or the stench of the Krogan Diarrhoea. As they are safely away Shepard asked again if they wanted to join the Normandy and Alan and Michael just paused and gathered themselves into a huddle debating whether they want to or not.

Alan rises from their little huddle and spoke "It would be an honour but..." Shepard rolled his eyes 'of course there is always a but every time he asked people to join his crew. "But sir we can't leave our elite N7 and of course the most awesome squad in Alliance history."

Shepard pondered on his answer and out of nowhere the squad leader came through the crowd with a proud smile on his face. "You both have been granted leave of this squad because I and the commander here have been talking about the transfer and I was the one who tipped him off where you two might be. Yes Michael, I pretty much know that you would organize a big party for our victory and spoils but I do know that you would not resist the temptation of a large crowd" the leader added with a smile. "And since the commander asked in person, how can I not deny after we have been through so much."

Tali and the duo looked dumb struck until Tali interrupted the silence. "Shepard I didn't know you had a secret affair behind my back. How long did this last long" She teased.

Michael gave an odd twit which Alan pretty much knew that a possible Gaydar has been set off. "Oh sorry Tali forgot to tell you that I and Bruce had been in a squad together, Hell he actually lead me and other group of marines before we were asked to join the N7 program." Shepard replied with a flirty tone towards Tali, Tali suddenly felt her legs tremble after hearing the her name said as they were making love which was quickly picked up by Alan but Michael being Michael doesn't have a clue in the world what's going on but was sniggering at the fact he finally found out his leaders name.

"Hey Bruce how's it going" Michael cheekily said which was followed with a punch in the gut which again winded him.

"Just because you know my name now corporal doesn't mean I grant you leave to use cheek to your superior officer." Bruce said irritated that Michael had the nerve to go informal on him especially when he is cocky. "You going to have a handful Shepard I wish you the best of luck and hope you complete what you need to do." Raising his hand to the commander who in turn took it.

"Like wise Major, hope to see you in the future" they both shook and the squad leader took off looking back at his two best soldiers knowing that he will miss them especially Michael which he found bizarre, 'good Luck you two, Keep Shepard safe.' He turned round and left knowing he will meet them again one day.

As the group depart they come up to the docked Normandy the brothers looked on in amazement until they saw the Cerberus insignia on the ship. Both at the same time they yelled "Fuck that!" and started to turn and leave. Tali and Shepard face palmed knowing that their reaction would be bad.

"Wait guys we are not with Cerberus we cut ties with them and we are using their ship so we can use their resources to stop the reapers." Shepard tried to convince them but he received the magic middle finger. "We got a good team on board that will give you guys a challenge and also to prank" Shepard hopefully tried to grab into their interests with only Michael stopping for the second at the sound of fresh victims for his secret missions. "We got booze and a very sexy woman on board" that grabbed their attention with both Alan and Michael rushing board with the relief of both Tali and Shepard.

"Thank god at least I don't have to threaten them with my shotgun" Tali playfully said.

"Indeed you don't Miss vas Normandy, now would you like to wait until tonight because I have something special for you, captains orders" Shepard replied with a hint of sexiness in his voice which made Tali melt.

"Anything for you my captain, just make sure the decontamination unit is set up properly, Lovers orders" she countered.

As the group finally entered the Normandy Shepard grabbed the brothers shoulders and proudly presents "Men welcome to the Normandy."

Followed by Michael whispering to Alan, "I thought he was going to rape us then".

Alan and Michael thanked Shepard for inviting them onto his ship and asked permission to tour around the ship which Shepard granted with only one condition that they do not go to the captain's quarters because it is only reserved for him and Tali unless he request to see some crew members to his quarters. The only reason Alan and Michael wanted to have a tour is only to scout the ship for any possible hiding places which Alan can easily spot in a second and Michael's sense of booze he seeks out and of course looking at what type his victims are, 'know your enemy and exploit their weaknesses' they both thought. With their secret mission to work they must know what type of person they are going to prank meaning what are their weaknesses and strengths. They were half way exploring the engine room until a synthetic voice came over the com.

"Welcome to the Normandy may you need of assistance" Alan and Michael stopped what they was doing and looked everywhere for the mysterious voice.

"I think there is a sexy woman wanting to assist our needs." Michael said sheepishly hoping that the mysterious woman would come out stark naked coming to assist them.

"I do not know a sexy woman you speak of. I am an _Enhanced Defence Intelligence _but I am called EDI".

Alan looked up in amazement knowing straight away who they are dealing with "Wow and AI, never met one before, So EDI, you been watching us taking a tour?"

"Yes I watch all movement aboard this ship but you two have drawn my interest because of the way you was searching in the most smallest of places that no other crew member have searched for." EDI elaborated. 'Shit' Michael thought. 'She is one obstacle in my secret missions'.

Michael spoke up "So EDI if you see anything unusual do you report it?"

"If it accrued to be a risk to the crew I will inform the commander of the potential risk, it is minor I would as you organics say turn a blind eye" EDI injected finding amusing and knowing that she is fully aware of the reputation the brothers has over their course in the Alliance. "Jeff would like to see you in the cockpit claiming to have a proposition for you two and I advise to seem him immediately because he is very anxious and excited to meet you."

Alan and Michael was took back with surprise that an AI has asked a request the pilot of the Normandy so they thought why the hell not and went to see their new potential victim of their secret operations. As they entered the cockpit they come face to face with the man they seem to know and enjoy hanging out with.

"JOKER, my man give, me some awesome skin" Michael yelled receiving a high five from their old friend."

"I can't believe you guys are on the Normandy been a long time eh? Gonna be like old times before I was stationed onto the Normandy and you guys joining the N7 program. Oh where my manners EDI you are looking at the most awesome brothers you will ever meet Alan and Michael." Joker gleefully introduced and seem to admire and respect them as they did when they was the badly trio.

"It's been a long time Joker, good to see you haven't fractured a thumb" Alan said playfully and the trio laughed at the good times they had. As joker asked EDI if the cost is clear Joker asked EDI to send the Brothers the prime targets of Shepard's crew. Which joker only gave them the weakness which the duo only needs to know so they can exploit?

_Grunt_

_Krogan_

_Weaknesses_

_Grunt does not like people invading his space and also does not enjoy any classical music which he finds weak and would go into fits of rage once he caught a scent of fish._

_Jacob Taylor_

_Human_

_Weaknesses_

_Hate to see his muscles all saggy and also scared of men in white hoods._

Alan laughed out loud when he read the last bit on Jacobs's weakness, "Hey Michael he's scared of men dressing as ghosts." Michael was more concentrated on reading the rest 'there isn't a lot of weaknesses but it will have to do.'

_Jack_

_Human_

_Weaknesses_

_Hates people stealing her stuff and despise Cerberus, if planning to use Cerberus as a source of secret operations, caution is advised that she is a very powerful biotic which will crush you into tiny pieces._

_Mordin Solus_

_Salarian_

_Weaknesses_

_Does not enjoy his tests and other experiments he is currently working on and also does not like sounds of farts in silence._

_Zaeed Massani_

_Human_

_Weakness_

_Zaeed does not like his belongings touched especially his prized rifle which he deeply cared about._

_Kasumi Goto_

_Human_

_Weakness_

_She does not like a person stealing from her which is ironic from a master thief and she also does not like people doing better than her on what she does best._

_Samara_

_Asari_

_Weakness_

_Insulting the code. WARNING by doing this may result in an imminent death._

_Thane Krios_

_Drell_

_Weakness_

_No current data is accessible, for unknown reasons Thane had created a very unique talent to hide weaknesses as it would be targeted by his enemies._

'Hmmmmm, this may prove difficult, oh well looks like we got to find out the hard way' Michael thought. 'Let's see what else we got'.

_Miranda Lawson_

_Human_

_Weakness_

_Hates crew members stepping their toe out of line and hates men looking at her body especially her bottom half and breasts._

_Legion_

_Geth_

_Weakness_

_Having to be wrong and seemed to be afraid when something does not seem right within his consensus. Jeff has advised using a porn virus to be uploaded into his consensus._

"Jesus Alan we got a Geth on board the Normandy! Oooo boy this bad boy will be on the top of my shit list when I get a good pornographic material that we can trick him to upload." Michael squealed out loud. He always wanted to trick a Geth but never had the chance until now.

_Garrus Vakarian_

_Turian_

_Weakness_

_Hates his privates stash of Turian porn and Turian Whisky being raided, (It is hidden under his bed and a secret compartment in the main guns battery), He also hates people showing off._

_Tali'Zorah vas Normandy_

_Quarian_

_Weakness_

_Hates to see her lover being in an immediate danger and also does not like people asking too many questions which may make the situation awkward. She seems to like to be in a quiet space from time to time. Advise loud screeching music to disgruntle her._

"And now boys the main event, which I know Michael you wish to get your revenge on him for escaping your plan back on the citadel. Here it is" Joker handed over a dossier about the man Michael is so keen to get his hands on.

_Commander Shepard_

_Human_

_Weakness_

_Shepard has collected a vast majority of model ships which he prized in. Any loss of a very rare to find collector's edition model may cause the Commander turning the ship upside down for it. He also regularly checks the decontamination unit which makes his room environment friendly for his lover to be out of her suit comfortably. Advice farting in the unit as the smell may cause discomfort to both Shepard and Tali._

As both Alan and Michael read the dossiers Joker waits patiently. They looked up and smiled.

"So guys when do we start?" Joker excitedly spoke up, couldn't resist the urge to find out what they are up to.

Alan grinned "Well boys we going to need a lot of planning and way too much resources and funding to get everything done. Men welcome to Operation Shit Storm."


	5. Chapter 4 OPeration ShitStorm

**Operation Shit Storm**

'This is the greatest and most dangerous mission in human history'. Michael was in his private room he has requested for him to make plans and use for private use. His private room is filled with many data pads and a white board filled with photos of Shepard and his crew which only consist his crew members that he had recruited for the suicide mission.

Alan walked into the private room seeing Michael blood shot eyes due to lack of sleep.

"Hi dear precious" Michael greeted with an obvious tone of very lack of sleep. Alan looked at him with pity knowing that Michael may need some booze down his throat to wake him up. He paced around the room seeing diagrams and scrapped plans and noticing the picture of Shepard with a big circle around it. 'Damn Michael you must hate his guts very bad'.

"I noticed you seem to forget making plans to target the others?" Alan asked noticing that the crew's picture has been discarded into a nearby waste bin or to Michael's perspective and nearby airlock. With a sudden glance he sees the photos of his intended targets floating out in space.

"Aaah dear brother, Shepard have thwarted and escaped my most diabolical shit storm back at the citadel." He ponders to think better words for his explanation why. "It has become clear to me that Shepard must be pranked and I will regain the dignity and the Awesomeness that have been killed back at the citadel". Michael leaned looking out at space possibly looking at the discarded photos wondering if he should or shouldn't have gotten rid of them. "Hmmm, might get joker to retrieve them later" he muttered to himself.

Alan walked to the nearby cabinet and gotten out a bottle of Krogan whisky out of Michael's booze cabinet and poured him a glass. Michael seeing the whisky in front of him shot up and drank the whisky back until it is all gone. Not to everyone's knowledge that Michael is the only Human who can drink as much alcohol and not get poisoning, drunk form the most strongest of drinks and also the ability to never have a hang over which his old squad mates claimed he has been given the head of the god's because no matter how drunk he got he never have a hangover.

"So Michael what evil payback have you got stored for the commander?"

Michael pondered on the answer again thinking on the best way to lay out the plan.

"Right this will be the same back on the citadel and it is extremely important that we do it really stealthy meaning you. If we do it right Shepard will never know it is us that have done it, I plan to steal and hide his most valued collection of them star ships he seemed to be fond of especially the rare exclusive Normandy sr2 edition." Michael carefully explained. "we need joker and EDI to come up some sort of an assignment to get Shepard, Tali and that god damn fine ass they call Miranda I want to bone Lawson."

Alan looked dumbfounded thinking how they are going to execute without getting caught. But with Michael he always has a backup if things go wrong or improvise, quite unsure which one.

Shortly after over the intercoms the brothers are ordered to come to Shepard as he needs a debriefing with the two.

"Alan, Michael" Shepard stared at the two. "It has come to my attention that you have found secret plans of a research ship controlled by Cerberus" The brothers are at an attention and nodded. "Do you guys have any idea what the data contains?"

Alan who is the only one who glimpsed and heard his sergeant called out what it contains spoke up. "Commander what I have glimpsed and hear it contains ship routes and some experiments and also if I can remember right planets and colonies that they have abducted."

"Do you know what the experiments are? Or the information about the ship routes and colonies?" Shepard questioned further. Alan shook his head. Shepard sighed hoping for better news. "That is unfortunate the data you have collected have been erased, seem Cerberus doesn't want us finding out what they are up to." Shepard paced through the briefing room seeing if he or the two brothers can add to what was happened but he only got in return surprised looks from the two, Which Michael always the person to break the silence.

"So our data that we have collected with the massive loot we have gained is fake?" Michael blurted out which to his relief Shepard shook his head implying they are in fact real. "Thank Alliance for that I thought I went ultra-awesome for nothing".

Shepard frowned and dismisses the two. Now what Shepard is looking forward too is his secret perverted thoughts he had planned with Tali later that night.

The time is now, with careful planning, With Shepard and Tali exhausted themselves with extreme Nocturnal activity. Michael plans to strike.

_Operation Shit Storm – N7 Awesome Michael._

_Air vents_

As we stealthily move through the vents with the occasional head banging and the occasional swearing when we went through the wrong vent which surprised Kasumi as she was doing something that she didn't want us to see. But let's not go into the detail as this report must be explained about what has transpired.

We have finally found the correct vent, while the two sleep Alan crushed his fingers trying to open the grating of the vents which forced me to put him too sleep with my Awesome putting people to sleep powers, it is done so he would not alert our presence but I fear the consequences would be grave when he comes round. I think I left him in the vents.

Due to my lack of skill in the art of stealth I have to use my other skill, the skill that can out match anyone. My Awesomeness. With such a skill I vaulted through the vents and smashed the casings and loaded all the models into the awesome bag and quickly vaulted back into the vent and the only response I got was a snore from Shepard. Maybe a little shuffle from Tali signalling she's up for more nocturnal activities. Tempted to watch because I have never seen an unmasked Quarian. But sadly it may jeopardize the mission. I left my brother in the vent expecting his own report of the aftermath but I still fear that his wrath will be terrible when he comes back. For security measures making sure the evidence does not point to me I have recruited joker and EDI to loop old footage between Shepard and Tali's nocturnal activities.

The bag which contains the models is in a classified location fearing that if anyone including Shepard discover this report only I would know it's exact location.

That is the end of this report as I have done exactly right after the mission, now my Awesomeness has returned and in the end I am still Awesome.

Michael read through his report and seemed amused of how much Awesome he had put into it. He smiled and filed it into his personal cabinet which is stored with his other reports about his pranks including the infamous Citadel shit bomb. He put a secret word password to keep it secure knowing nobody except him and his brother knows the password.

Then next morning a huge roar of hanger stormed the ship with everyone on their heels and have a chilling fear down their spine, Miranda was filing reports when she heard the roar and she knew better to keep out of his way because Shepard is pissed. Grunt paced through his room knowing he wouldn't be able to take on Shepard because what's worse than a pissed off Krogan. A pissed off Shepard. Garrus went through the decontamination unit and burst through the room finding Shepard's prized models have been stolen. Garrus sighed knowing Shepard would storm through the ship with the foulest mood the galaxy will ever see.

Tali sit up with the sheets over her staring at Shepard's unexpected rage which she does not understand.

Shepard raised the alert for everyone to search every deck, spot and gap they could find and search it. Alan unlucky he sometimes be wakes up with a headache and curses under his breath knowing he have been left behind on a mission and also the possibility that he would be caught and face his wrath,

'I'm gonna kill that Bastard when I get my hands on him' Alan thought with murder in his eyes.


End file.
